Second Chances
by Andie O'Neill
Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after a surprise attack she dies in his arm, he begins to regret hurting her, but of course its to late... or is it?
1. Chapter 1

Second Chances

By Andie O'Neill

Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after she dies in his arm, he begins to regret what he did… but of course its to late… or is it?

A/N: Warning! This story is pretty angsty, and there is a character death, but it's not exactly what you'd think…. Am I being cryptic enough for you?

* * *

Chapter One

He'd known something was wrong with her, noticed she was distracted. For weeks her mind always seemed to be else where, lost in thought. He was starting to get worried. Sheppard watched Elizabeth Weir work in her office late at night, trying to finish up the reports to be sent to Earth tomorrow morning. Now or never, he repeated in his mind as he walked over to the office door, hesitating only for a second before he walked inside. "Elizabeth… do you ever sleep?" he asked, smiling.

Elizabeth looked up from her work and smiled back at him. "These days I'm not even sure I remember what it's like to sleep," she muttered, sighing as she scrolled through the reports.

John took a seat on her desk, watching her for a second as she focused on the computer. "Care for a break?"

"No thanks, I should really finish this now."

"How much you got left?"

"Too many to count."

John shook his head, closing her laptop. "Then I'd say it's time for a break. You have dinner yet?"

Elizabeth frowned. "Actually I haven't eaten all day."

"I was just heading to get myself something to eat, why don't you join me?"

Elizabeth looked down, shaking her head as her hands moved to reopen the laptop. "I can't… I really need to finish these reports. I promise to get something to eat as soon as I'm down."

Normally he'd let go by this point, but he wasn't gonna stop there this time, not when he knew the reports weren't the reason why she was declining his invitation. "Is… everything okay, Elizabeth?" he finally asked, not seeing any other way to get her talking.

"I'm fine."

"Elizabeth, you should know by now that I can usually tell when someone's lying to me… especially if their a friend. What's up?"

"John, I'm fine… really. I just have a lot on my mind, it's nothing."

"Elizabeth, whatever's on your mind is starting to show… you've been distracted. People can tell that something is going on, spill it."

Elizabeth took a deep breath, shutting her laptop. "I know… I'm just not really ready to talk about it."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm not. John, stop pushing this."

John was beginning to get frustrated with the woman before him. Why wouldn't she just tell him? It couldn't be that bad, could it? "Would you say we were close friends, Elizabeth?"

"Of course I would."

"There aren't many people to confide in when you're the leader of a city far away from anyone not under your command. Everyone needs someone to talk to… talk to me, Elizabeth."

Elizabeth sighed, rubbing her forehead for a second. "I heard a rumor… a while ago."

A rumor? Why would a rumor be bothering Elizabeth so much? "A rumor?"

"About us…."

Ah… now they were getting somewhere. "What about us?"

Elizabeth looked down, unable to look him in the eye anymore. "People have begun to notice how much time we spend together… how close we've gotten. They've started to talk John… they saw we have feelings for each other. That I… have feelings for you."

John paused; he'd heard the rumors himself. People had gone crazy after the kiss he and Elizabeth had shared during their alien possession. Sheppard suspected McKay to be the one who'd opened his big mouth about the whole thing; unfortunately he couldn't kill the man for suspicion alone. "It's a rumor, Elizabeth… it's not like it means anything. You shouldn't be so affected by gossip… it's not like its true or anything."

Elizabeth continued to look down, not saying a word.

"Elizabeth?"

Still she said nothing, continuing to look away. Finally she closed her eyes. "I should get back to work." Weir moved her eyes to the laptop, opening it quickly.

John could feel his heart beat faster as he realized what her silence meant. "It's not just a rumor is it? You… have feelings for me?"

Elizabeth cleared her through, her eyes still on the laptop. "John, I have a lot of work to catch up on… could we talk about this later?"

"No, we're going to discuss this now. How long have you felt this way?"

Elizabeth paused, finally looking up at him. "A while," she whispered.

To say Sheppard was shocked would have been an understatement. She'd certainly hidden it well. "A while? And exactly how long is a while?"

"Look John I'm-"

John eased off her desk, unsure how to take this news, clueless as to how to handle it. "Elizabeth, this is important! I don't care if you're busy! We need to nip this problem in the bud. You know we could never… be in a relationship, right?"

Suddenly Elizabeth went silent, looking away from him.

"Elizabeth, I do care about you… you know that, but as a friend. I just need to know if friendship is all you expect."

Suddenly Weir looked up at him, her face growing emotionless. "Well as your expedition leader I can assure you that you have nothing to worry about, Colonel Sheppard, now if you'll excuse me I think it's time I finish my work."

Colonel Sheppard? Oh crap, that was never a good sign. Sheppard watched her focus her attention on her work, completely ignoring the fact that he was even in the room. John deflated; knowing anything more he did to explain himself would probably just make things worse. The Colonel slowly turned around and left her office, leaving her to her work.

* * *

It had been a week since Sheppard had a real conversation with Weir, a very long week, and the thought frustrated the hell out of him. He knew it was more than their positions in Atlantis that kept him from a relationship with Elizabeth. The fact was, John wasn't good with relationships… people saw him as a love em and leave em kinda guy, that was because it seemed to be all he was good at. Women were attracted to him, and he knew it well, but love was a different story all together. It had been years since his last real relationship, and it hadn't ended well. He just wasn't cut out for relationships; he'd accepted that… a relationship with Elizabeth would ruin everything, including their friendship. They hadn't even done anything and it had already messed up their friendship.

Sheppard watched Elizabeth from a distance as she did her job, finishing the talks with one of the elders of the tribe for an alliance. The village was surrounded by ruins with Ancient writings, and Doctor Weir had been working on make a deal with them to look at the ruins for days. It hadn't been until she came to their world to discuss things that she'd begun to make progress. Elizabeth finished her conversation before breaking off from Elder Corta, walking towards John and his team. "Well, he's agreed to allow us access to the ruins, as well as provided coordinates to other writings located in the caves. Elder Corta believes I'll find them to be important for our research."

"Caves? These wouldn't be very small caves would they?" Rodney asked. "My allergies have been going crazy ever since I got here… dust would just be topping on the cake!"

"Relax, Rodney, I'm going to check it out myself. Colonel Sheppard, I'd like you and your team to head towards the ruins you found earlier and let Rodney get to work while I head towards the caves. Corta said he'd show me around."

"Don't you think it would be best if someone went with you? No offence to Elder Corta, but I don't like the idea of you being alone without a guard."

Elizabeth sighed. "Fine Colonel, if it makes you feel any better, you can come along. Will that work?"

John glared at her, annoyed by her attitude. He was just trying to protect her! "Yes Doctor that will work just fine."

"Good." Elizabeth turned around, not even bothering to check if he was with her as she headed back toward Corta. "Elder Corta, we're ready whenever you are."

Corta smiled warmly at Weir, giving Sheppard an uneasy feeling. "I'm glad to hear it Doctor Weir, let us go. There is much for you to see."

* * *

It had been hours since they'd left for the caves, and John was beginning to wonder if they'd ever get there. It was driving him nuts just walking in silence next to Elizabeth, Corta walking head as he lead them toward the Ancient writings. Finally he'd had enough. "You must _really_ be pissed at me."

"Excuse me?"

Sheppard could tell she wasn't in the mood, but against his better judgment he forged ahead. "Look, I know I may have hurt your feelings that night we talked in your office, but you have to understand-"

"I understand perfectly, Colonel."

"If that were true you'd stop calling me by my rank all of the sudden. We haven't even had a decent conversation since that night and you can't just ignore the fact that there's been uneasiness around us lately."

"Actually I can ignore a lot of things, Colonel Sheppard."

"Stop it!" he finally snapped. "Will you just stop with the attitude and just talk to me! Elizabeth, there are a ton of reasons why you and I could never work."

"Yeah, I got that," she muttered, her eyes continuing to stay focused ahead.

"Then why are you being so hostile toward me?"

"I've grown lax in my leader ship. I'm in charge of this expedition and it's time I act like it. I've let attachments and emotions stand in the way of my duties more than I'd like to admit, Colonel, it can't happen again."

Sheppard stopped walking again, not believing what he was hearing. As he watched Elizabeth walk further and further away from him, he realized it seemed almost symbolic when she left him completely. Finally John began to head after her once more, realizing his duty to protect her was more important than his wish to just turn around and leave her to her work. He couldn't believe her! She was letting her emotions get in the way now, and yet she's gonna talk about focusing on her duties! Suddenly he heard fire ahead, and his walking quickly turned to running. "Elizabeth!"

It didn't take long for him to reach her, but he froze the moment he saw her, lying in Corta's arms as he held his hand against her chest, trying to stop the bleeding. Finally he looked up, his fear noticeable. "She is dying, Colonel! You must help her."

Sheppard ran over to her, grabbing her and pulling her from Corta's arms to his own. "Elizabeth! Stay with me here!" John moved a hand to his radio. "I NEED HELP HERE! ELIZABETH'S HURT! GUNFIRE WOUND TO THE CHEST! LOCK ON TO MY SIGNAL AND FOLLOW IT!" John rigged his radio to keep signaling the message then set it down to the side, holding her close. "Elizabeth!" She was falling in and out of consciousness. "What the hell happened!"

"I don't know. The forest makes it easy for enemies to hide… but these woods are sacred… my people and all the other villages would never dishonor the Ancients with violence in this place."

John looked around him, trying to find something to help him stop the bleeding. She was losing a lot of blood, and John was beginning to worry the gun shot had pierced her heart. Finally he located tough looking leaves nearby on a plant. "Hand me the leaves, over there. We need to stop the bleeding."

Corta nodded, scrambling to get what John asked him for, then quickly handed it over. Sheppard set to work, putting as much pressure on her wound as possible, before tearing the strap from his backpack to tie the leaves to her chest. "Will she be okay, Colonel?"

"I don't know… the gun shot may have pierces her heart… if it did my team may not get here in time to get us and take her back home." John's eyes stayed on Weir as she lie still in his arms, her skin paler by the second. "Elizabeth! Stay with me here! You gotta wake up!" He needed to know she was going to survive this. God, she couldn't die now! Not after everything that had happened between them in the last week! Not this way!

Slowly her eyes opened, and she looked up at him. "J… John?"

"Elizabeth! You've been shot! You have to stay with me here! I'll get you outta here soon! Just STAY WITH ME!"

Elizabeth closed her eyes for a few seconds before they focused on him once again. "Ca… can't," she whispered, the pain making it hard for her to speak.

"No Elizabeth! You can! Stay with me! I can't lose you!"

Her eyes were going dull, she lost her focus, her head was slowly falling to the side.

"Elizabeth! ELIZABETH! Don't you dare leave me now! Elizabeth!" He was too upset to realize there were tears falling down his face as her eyes finally closed and she stopped breathing. "Dammit!" he swore as he checked for a pulse. When he found none, he moved her down to the ground, beginning CPR without hesitation. Two rescue breathes, fifteen compressions. One rescue breath, fifteen compressions. He repeated it over and over again, praying that his team would get to them soom. "Dammit Elizabeth, hold on! They're on their way! HOLD ON!"

* * *

When Colonel John Sheppard finally walked back on Atlantis everyone knew something was wrong by the defeated look on his face, he looked lost. "Colonel!" one of the majors had greeted, but he didn't register anyone around him as he dropped the stuff he'd been carrying and left the gateroom. His team followed behind him. Everyone in the gateroom froze as they saw what Ronan carried in his arms, the looks on each of Sheppard's team filled with pain. Doctor Elizabeth Weir was gone, unable able to be revived. Ronan took a few more steps as the gate shut down, then finally walked over to a now stunned Major Lorne. "Doctor Weir's been killed. There was an attack on her way towards some caves she planned on researching."

Teyla then moved forward, her face still wet from when she'd been crying. "Send Carson to take the body for examination."

Lorne nodded slowly, his eyes never leaving the body of their dead leader.

To Be Continued….

A/N: Great way to start a story eh guys? Review if you want more!


	2. Chapter 2

Second Chances

By Andie O'Neill

Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after she dies in his arm, he begins to regret what he did… but of course its to late… or is it?

A/N: Wow, I was sure you'd be threatening death for ending the chapter with such angst! lol Thanks for the reviews so far! Don't stop! Gotta have my fix to keep going!

* * *

Chapter Two

McKay stared down at the lifeless body, his friend. Doctor Elizabeth Weir had always seemed to be so understanding, so patient with him. It had been the reason Rodney had liked her so much, admired her so highly. Rodney folded his arms, trying to contain any emotions trying to escape at the sight of her. "Rodney, there was nothing any of you could have done. The bullet pierced her heart… it was dipped in poison… just as soon as it hit her it began seeping poison into her blood stream. There would have been no way to save her."

Doctor McKay knew it, knew there was nothing he could have done, and yet the feeling was still there. If only he'd been smart enough… strong enough…. I should have been the one to check out the caves. I should be the one lying here."

"Rodney, your death would have been just as bad as losing Doctor Weir. Your expertise is important to this expedition. Elizabeth would be the first person to tell you that."

"But she can't tell me that, Carson." Rodney turned to look at the Doctor beside him, unable to put into words how many emotions were running through him. "She can't tell me that because SHE IS DEAD! We relied on her… trusted in her! She was a good leader, a strong leader! And now… I just can't believe she's gone."

"I know, Rodney… I know."

* * *

All of Atlantis had been affected by the news that spread of Doctor Elizabeth Weir's demise. People had been shaken at how sudden it had been. Whereas before when the expedition had faced loss, Elizabeth had been the rock to keep them together, now they had no one to rely on… no one but each other, but was it enough? Teyla had been wandering the hallways of Atlantis for hours before finally stopping in front of his room. No one had seen him for hours, and knowing Colonel John Sheppard as she did, she'd been sure that his isolation would only do more damage than had already been done on the terrible day slowly drawing to its end. She hesitated only for a second before knocking.

"Come in," the voice inside said.

Teyla brushed her hand past the sensor on the side of his door before walking inside to face a room of darkness. "Colonel Sheppard?"

"What do you want Teyla?" She was surprised at how quiet his voice sounded, as if he didn't have the strength to make his voice strong.

"Doctor Beckett has finished his report on Doctor Weir's cause of death. He found a poison in her blood stream. The bullet had been soaked in it. When it pierced her heart, it must have sent the poison through her blood stream…. Elder Corta's village is not advanced enough to create a gun… they don't even believe in violence unless the lives of the village is at stake."

"We thought the same thing when we met the Genii… look how that turned out."

Teyla took a few steps forward, noticing the outline of his body in the darkness. He was sitting in his bed looking at something, a bowl or pot of some kind. "Colonel… are you well?"

"You know I gave this to her… during the first year we spent in Atlantis… it was for her birthday."

Teyla walked further into the room, seeing more and more of him as she drew closer. "Yes… she kept it on her desk."

"I had one of your people make it just for her… I'm not really sure why it had been so important to me."

"Sometimes pleasing a friend is more important than we realize."

"She was more than a friend to me Teyla… I just didn't see it," he whispered, putting the pot down beside him. "I guess none of that matters now."

"I would say it matters. Doctor Weir may be gone, but the moments you shared with her will always be with you."

"You don't understand, Teyla… you couldn't."

"You think I do not understand loss, Colonel Sheppard? Do you not forget the life I lived before you and your people came? I have lost more in my life than you will ever know… and the truth is… no matter how many times it has happened, it has never once been easy. What has helped me continue on is the knowledge of what they would have wished for me. I know Doctor Weir would never have wanted you to sit here grieving her loss. The city will look to you now that Weir has gone."

"Teyla… I was SUPPOSED to protect her. The whole reason I CAME WITH HER was for protection and I couldn't do a thing! It's MY fault she's gone… I HAVE TO LIVE WITH THAT!"

"It is the person who did this to her that is at fault, no one else! Remember that, John, if nothing else."

John finally lifted his head, his eyes finding hers. "I've tried… but how do you remind yourself of that when all you see is that moment in time replay over and over and over again? How can I remember that one fact that even I can't get myself to believe? She's gone, Teyla… and no matter how hard I try… in the end it always comes back to a choice. I let down my guard and now I'll never see her again," he told her before getting up. "Now if you excuse me… I'm pretty tired."

Teyla frowned, knowing she shouldn't leave, but assured that John would never allow her to discuss things any further than they'd already talked. Teyla instead chose to bow her head in acceptance. "Sleep well, Colonel."

"Yeah," he muttered, moving back to sit in bed, watching as Teyla walked out of the room. John turned his head, staring at the pot sitting next to him still. He knew it wouldn't matter how tired he'd get… sleep would never come to him tonight.

* * *

It almost hurt to walk past her office, walk past her room, but what drew him more than anything was the balcony that seemed to call to him. Slowly John walked up the steps, is eyes never leaving the door that would bring him to the special place beyond. It was strange how sometimes the balcony had felt more comfortable than even his room… probably because every time he'd been there, someone else had been with him, someone to make it special. Finally he reached the door, and after a deep breath to center himself, he walked outside the city. He really did understand why she loved the place so much. It was beautiful, no matter the time… always beautiful. John looked around the large balcony, almost feeling as if she wasn't gone when he stood here in her favorite place.

Sheppard closed his eyes, taking in the sounds around him of the waves crashing against Atlantis, the salty wind blowing all around him. When he looked up he could see nothing but stars, such a vast number covered the sky that it was beyond comprehension. Elizabeth had always said it was the stars that reminded her that she wasn't alone… he'd never quite understood what she meant until now. The Stargate was what took them where they wanted to go, what planet they wanted to visit, but sometimes it almost felt unreal, but the stars… knowing the planets that orbited those stars… it reminded him that there really was life out there, people raised on other planets… some with two moons, some with none… all so similar to Earth, yet so extremely different. He understood now.

"God Elizabeth… I'm so sorry," he whispered to the sky, not sure what he believed after the things he'd seen. He'd never been a deeply religious man, never even knew for sure what could possibly be out there, but he did know this… whatever was out there… God, god-like aliens… he wasn't sure, but one way or another he had to believe there was more than what he saw around him. Maybe one day… he'd know for sure. One day.

Sheppard shook the thoughts from his mind. 'Don't go there, John… just let it be.' John looked down at the waves, only highlighted by the stars lighting the sky. Suddenly he couldn't help but relive the week that had started his problems with Elizabeth.

FLASHBACK

"I heard a rumor… a while ago."

"A rumor?"

"About us…."

"What about us?"

"People have begun to notice how much time we spend together… how close we've gotten. They've started to talk John… they say we have feelings for each other. That I… have feelings for you."

"It's a rumor, Elizabeth… it's not like it means anything. You shouldn't be so affected by gossip… it's not like its true or anything."

END FLASHBACK

Was it even true anymore? How could it be? Elizabeth HAD felt something more for him… but the question was… how did he feel about her?

FLASHBACK

"Elizabeth, I do care about you… you know that, but as a friend. I just need to know if friendship is all you expect."

END FLASHBACK

He was an asshole… plain and simple. Colonel John Sheppard was a giant asshole. He'd been so busy trying to tell himself that all that was there was friendship, that he hadn't realized that all he wanted was more. He belonged with a woman like Teyla… sexy, a fighter with the same types of scars as himself. Elizabeth Weir had been so different, so completely different. She'd always been beautiful, but she also carried an innocence with it… as if she didn't know it, wasn't as confident that it was true. She was a genius to the core, but didn't care to rub it in anyone's face. She saw herself as less than important as those serving under her. It was what made her such a great leader. It didn't matter if the person who'd died was a Colonel, a Lieutenant, or a scientist drowning in the genius of all those better than him or her… they were all much more important than her own life.

What she never realized was just how important her own life was to them…. Sheppard finally straightened up, the grief he felt being suppressed… Teyla was right. He needed to stop wallowing in his own grief. Someone had killed Elizabeth, and he was going to find out who… and kill the son of a bitch as slowly as humanly possible. John turned and left the balcony with a new purpose… what came after that didn't matter anymore. He needed to find the person responsible, and bring that person the only justice John Sheppard knew. As of that moment, in John's eyes, they were as good as dead.

* * *

Elder Corta paced back and forth, his fear noticeable as he tried to calm himself, waiting at the mouth of the cave. Finally an older man calm walked out to meet him, raising an eyebrow as he noticed the man's distress. "Corta… are you well?"

"Those from the Ancient city have contacted us once more. They wish permission to explore the area where Doctor Weir was killed in order to find out what happened, and capture the one who is responsible!"

"Corta, we knew this may occur… we have everything under control. Let them come."

"Lord, if they find out the truth, there will be nothing to quench their rage over our involvement! I cannot allow my people to come to danger."

"We promised to protect you, Corta, and that is what we will do… whether the enemy be Wraith or others, we have the means to hide you from harm. You have nothing to fear, dear one. Continue in the path you have chosen and take faith in our promise."

"This Colonel Sheppard… he cared deeply for Doctor Weir… I watched him try to revive her. Is pain was extremely evident… I fear nothing will stop the rage in his heart."

"Corta, let them come. Let them explore. They may live in the Ancient city, but they nothing of its power… or its destiny. Colonel John Sheppard will do no harm, you have my word."

"I fear that may not be enough. If they find out who is responsible, my family, my village is in grave danger. You have promised me protection for all my days after all I have done for you."

The man moved his hand to Corta's shoulder, a warm smile directing itself at the elder. "Fear not, dear one… all will be put back in its place if we finish what we have started."

Corta simply bowed his head. "Yes, lord… I understand. I apologize for my lack of faith."

"It is understandable, Corta, think nothing of it. Trust us… we will live up to our part of the agreement, as you have lived up to yours."

"Of course… I must go to allow the Colonel access to our sacred woods. I have someone contact you when they arrive."

"Thank you, Elder Corta… now, I must go… safe passage back."

Corta once again bowed his head before turning away and leaving the way he came.

To Be Continued….

A/N: Duh duh DUHHHHHHH. :D Hmmm… how in the world is Corta involved… and who's the weird stranger living in the cave that has enough power to protect the planet from the Wraith? More twists and turns to come! lol


	3. Chapter 3

Second Chances

By Andie O'Neill

Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after she dies in his arm, he begins to regret what he did… but of course its to late… or is it?

A/N: Hey guys! Back again… I thought I'd relieve your suffering just a bit, but don't think it's over:evil grin: Oh and I know this chapter is a bit short, but I wanted to get something to you and this was what I came up with in the time I had. Enjoy:D

* * *

Chapter Three

"Elder Corta, I know why you hesitate to agree to this, but we must find Elizabeth's killer. It is a matter of justice," Teyla said through the speaker, her eyes looking at the activated wormhole ahead. She waited, knowing Corta was hesitating on how to answer, finally he let out a breath.

"I understand. It would dishonor all that Doctor Weir stood for if you did not bring her justice. I will allow you to begin your investigation, but you must not carry weapons near the sacred caves. It would dishonor all that WE stand for."

"I will talk this over with Colonel Sheppard, Elder Corta, thank you."

"Do not thank me yet. We have not found your killer, and until we do… you owe me nothing."

"Good will to you."

"And good will to you as well. I shall inform my village that you will be arriving soon."

"Thank you, that would be most welcomed. Good bye Elder Corta."

"And good bye to you too, dear Teyla of the Athosians."

Teyla nodded to one of the techs to cut gate power. The tech frowned, cutting off the gate. "You think the Colonel will agree?"

"Most likely he will bring weapons none will know exist with him… he would not go into a dangerous area without some way of defending himself. If we are caught, I cannot even know what consequences we will face."

"Doctor Weir would never want you guys to put your neck on the line for this."

"Doctor Weir is dead, Lieutenant," she reminded the Lieutenant softly, moving a hand to the man's shoulders. "Colonel Sheppard is in charge now, and I believe he will do whatever it is that is necessary to complete this mission… she deserves at least that much."

The officer nodded in agreement before looking down. "I'd say she deserved way more than that, Teyla."

"And I would say you were right, Lieutenant… so let us do what we can." Teyla looked away, patting the tech's back before leaving to inform Colonel Sheppard of what was now going on.

* * *

He'd been asleep when it happened, he'd heard the doors slide open softly, and then slide shut. Footsteps followed, leading toward his bed. John opened his eyes, turning on his back as he tried to look through the darkness to see who'd entered his room without permission. "Hello?"

Nothing.

The footsteps slowly stopped, and he could hear faint breathing beside his bed. Finally the stranger spoke. "Relax, John," the woman whispered. Strange… she sounded so much like Elizabeth, but that couldn't be! Elizabeth Weir was gone… this couldn't be real. Or perhaps he was mistaken? Suddenly he felt a hand touch his cheek, sliding down his face, his neck, his chest, and stopping on his belly. The bed dipped as the intruder sat beside him. "That's it… just relax."

"Elizabeth?" he called, he had to know.

The woman said nothing, but instead shifted on the bed until John felt her lips on his. The lips were soft, and strangely familiar. He knew those lips… he could feel it. John moved a hesitant hand to her cheek before inching toward her full head of hair. He could feel the curls around his fingertips. When she finally moved away he breathed out, his breath shaky as he realized the truth.

"It is you, isn't it? How can you be here beside me? How is this possible?"

"I love you, John," Elizabeth whispered into his ear. He shivered as he felt her lips caress his earlobe. "I've loved you for a long, long time."

"God," he moaned as the hand on his belly moved under his shirt. "Elizabeth, why did you leave me? God… why couldn't I save you?"

"John, listen to me, you are not at fault. You didn't do anything wrong. Don't you dare blame yourself… I certainly don't blame you."

"Elizabeth… I… god… I love you. I never should have told you that lie about me seeing you as a friend. I don't. You are a beautiful, amazing woman… and I don't deserve your love."

"Yes, John, you do."

John moved his head up to rest his forehead against hers, his eyes closing to stop the tears from escaping. "I can't let you go… you can't really be gone. Please tell me your death was just a dream."

Elizabeth once again kissed his lips, deeper than before, her mouth molding onto his, tongues tangling together. "This is the dream, John. It was just my time."

"No, Elizabeth, please… it's real… it's gotta be real. Your not gone, I can feel you."

"John, you have to wake up."

"No! I won't let go! I can't lose you again!"

"John, you have to let go. There's nothing you can do but let go. You know I love you, hold on to that and go forward. I'll always be beside you…" she paused, moving her hand up his chest and against his heart. "I'll always be right here."

John moved a hand to overlap hers, looking into her eyes, straining to see her. "I know."

* * *

John opened his eyes, once again alone. It had been a dream… a horrible dream! Dammit! He couldn't do this! He could feel anger course through him, his frustration growing. It was morning, he had to do something. John jumped out of bed and began to get ready for work… knowing although it was probably early, that from the light shining through his winder, it was indeed morning. He needed to focus, stay busy… anything but face what he knew he'd lost when Elizabeth died in his arms. He just wished he knew how to find himself again.

* * *

The pounding in her head was bad enough, but she was sure the soreness in her body would subdue her. Where the heck was she? She groaned in pain, but was unable to move a muscle as more and more of her senses were reawakened. Slowly she forced her eyes open to see a ceiling of rock over her. She tried to move her head, but it was useless, she couldn't do a thing. "H… he… hello?" she stuttered out, her voice strangely stiff as she tried to speak.

"She awakens," someone whispered in the dim cave.

Suddenly a face appeared in her line of sight. "We were beginning to wonder if you would ever awaken. How do you feel?"

"Head… hurts… sore… can't move."

"That would be the result of the mixture we gave you. I apologize for the steps we were forced to take, but we believe it may be the only way to finish what we've started."

"Started?"

The older man nodded, as he smiled warmly at her. "We are enemies of the wraith, as well as the many other evils that live in this galaxy. I have heard a great deal of men and women living in the ancient city called Atlantis. I was told you are its leader, was I mistaken?"

She knew she'd need more information before she gave him any answers. "Who are you?"

The older man simply chuckled at her question. "I promise, young woman, you have nothing to fear from me. Besides my dear, with all the knowledge I carry it would be far too easy to simply force it from you, but that is not my way."

"The others will come for me. Kidnapping me is not the way to start a conversation."

The older man sighed, rubbing his eyes before looking back down at her. "I'm afraid that is not so. In order to accomplish what we must… we had to do something… less than acceptable. As of yesterday, you were… killed, Doctor Weir… I'm sorry."

"WHAT!"

"As you have stayed here, my servant began taking DNA from you while you slept… mostly hair follicles… nothing big. We used the DNA he gave us to create a clone… perfect in every way to you. They would never know there was a difference."

Elizabeth frowned, unsure what to say. "What do you want from me!"

The older man's frown grew his eyes sorrowful. "My name is Poseion. I am no threat to you, Doctor Weir, but I must complete what I came here to do. You see… there is something you must know of the city you have lived in for as long as you have. The ancient city… Atlantis… it is my creation. I was once what you call an Ancient until me death. I was also one of the first to ascend to a higher plain of existence. I come to you for aid. You see… I believe you may be my only hope to once and for all, rid this galaxy of the plague you call Wraith. That is why you cannot go back to your people… why I made them believe you were dead."

Elizabeth stared back at the older man, unable to speak as the new information seeped in. For once in Elizabeth's life, she had no idea what to think.

To Be Continued

A/N: Well, Elizabeth IS alive… but why can't she go back? And what plan does this Poseion guy have in mind. Oh and for those who may not know this, the story of Atlantis goes that the god Poseidon pretty much created Atlantis, named after his son Atlas. Since in some cases names and history have been switched a bit from those millions of years ago to the present timeline, I thought I'd sort of tell the real story of Atlantis… well… real in a fan fiction sort of way! lol Did that at all make any sense to you guys?


	4. Chapter 4

Second Chances

By Andie O'Neill

Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after she dies in his arm, he begins to regret what he did… but of course its to late… or is it?

A/N: Sorry this took so long, guys! I'd just like to warn you guys though, that although I tried to keep it kinda vague, there is one part near the end of this fic that deals with force of a more complicated kind. It's not rape! But when you read, you'll get the idea what I mean.

* * *

_**Chapter Four**_

"You capture me against my will, make my friends believe I'm dead, and now you tell me I have to stay here!" she asked, unable to believe what she was hearing.

Poseion sighed, closing his eyes. "Doctor Weir, if you were ever allowed back to Atlantis the others would know what I have done. They may even decide to reverse it!"

"What you have DONE?" she asked, ignoring her pounding head. With effort she sat up in the bed, her eyes staying on Poseion.

He slowly took a step back, running a hand through his hair. "We will not know for some time if it worked… but if it has… we could never allow that kind of power to fall into any other's hands. It would be disastrous. Too many in the past have made these mistakes; we will not be one of them. To give humanity a weapon of this magnitude would be foolish. We would have no control over what you do with it, how you would use it."

"Weapon? What did you do to me?" Elizabeth asked, trying to force the fear from her voice.

"Nothing… to you, but we have genetically altered the eggs in your reproductive organs. If you were ever to have a child… he or she would have the very knowledge of the Ancients, as well as certain gifts genetically written into their DNA. You would never be able to handle the information… but the child would… the genetic modifications during its growth would see to that. As he or she would mature, the information would slowly reveal itself until he is old enough to assimilate it all. In effect, Doctor Weir… he or she would be born with the mind of my people, with physical advantages not even we had at our disposal. They would be the perfect weapon against the Wraith… mentally and physically advanced in every way, as well as resistance to being fed upon by the Wraith."

If five years ago, someone told her she'd be living in another galaxy… captured and genetically manipulated… she'd have sent them to the looney bin, but there it was. "How can you do this! How can you just take someone's life and use it without even carrying how they feel on the matter!"

"We needed a human female, Elizabeth. The woman Teyla, we realized was not raised on Earth as you were. Although relatively the same, there are many differences that not even you have the ability to detect."

"Why a human? Why me?"

"It was the only way to receive the best results of the alterations we made. On your world there are many who are born with certain… disabilities. Some on your world that have become mates were not genetically compatible to one another; their DNA is more likely to combined and create something deficient. We needed to find two people who would be more likely to create together a healthy child due to compatibility in DNA. When we finally found a match… we had no choice but to proceed. We knew you would not support our research. Therefore we did what we had to do in order to see the success of our mission."

Elizabeth froze her voice suddenly shaky as she realized what they were saying. "You're… you're going to impregnate me." It was not a question.

"Yes, with the DNA host to a man you know as Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard. He is your match, and with his help, we may finally fulfill what we came here to do."

Elizabeth's eyes widened at the name, and her heart dropped as the realization became clear. Not only were they going to force her to become pregnant, but they were going to force her to become pregnant to John Sheppard's baby.

* * *

John watched as the gate slowly dialed to the last planet they'd visited. Teyla had been a bit worried as to whether he would be able to stand going back, but he knew he needed to do this. He needed closure. He couldn't let go of Elizabeth unless he found the person responsible, and brought that person to justice. Elizabeth had not died in vain; he would make sure of it. Something would come out of her death. 

Suddenly the wormhole opened. Teyla looked back at him, a sad smile on her lips just before she turned back around and walked through the Stargate. Ronan followed soon after, and then finally Rodney. John took in a deep breath and released it just before entering the gate.

* * *

"At least let me see them! Let me talk to them! If I can't go back, at least give me that!" 

Poseion sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Elizabeth, I know this is hard for you, but if they know you are okay, then they will come after you. They won't give up so easily."

"I want to see my friends! You take everything, my life, away from me, and you can't even give me a moment with the people I love! Don't I at least deserve THAT much! You did all of this AGAINST my will, and yet the one thing I ask in return is to SEE my friends, yet you won't even give me that!"

"Elizabeth-"

"No! You know, you may say the Wraith are your enemy, but at least THEY do what they do because it's their only way to survive! But you! You take people from their homes, and the people they care about for personal gain!"

"I do this to save lives, Elizabeth! You must understand, that all of this is to save the lives of all those dealing with the affliction of the Wraith!"

"You don't get to choose! You don't get to choose whose life is more important! No one does!"

"I will not harm you. I will make sure all your needs are met with, and it will be up to you to raise the child you will bear."

"Oh well thanks a lot! That's much better! That just makes it all better!"

"Doctor Weir! Nothing I do can make it 'better.' All I can do is try my best to give you what you need."

"What I NEED is to go home! My home! What I NEED is the ability to see my family and friends again! Don't pretend to CARE about MY needs! Go ahead and hide behind your ultimate goal of destroying the Wraith, but don't think I don't see through it all! You don't give a damn about my needs! All you care about is destroying the Wraith, and your willing to do anything and everything to do it."

"Well, I'm sorry you feel that way, especially considering how closely we'll have to be working together to raise this child."

Elizabeth turned around, shaking her head. "I wouldn't count on that just yet. On Atlantis we've sacrificed a lot in our fight against the Wraith, but in the end we always got out of it victorious. This just may be one of those times, Poseion."

"I guess we shall see soon enough, Doctor Weir."

* * *

Teyla bowed as she met up with the man standing before her. "Elder Corta," she greeted, with respect. 

"Teyla, it is our sincere hope that you find all that you are looking for. We have made arrangements for tonight, so you may be comfortable. First thing in the morning I will help you in your search for Doctor Weir's killer. If there is anything I can provide, you must let me know immediately. I feel responsible for the suffering you are being inflicted with… if there is any way I can help, please let me know."

John walked up beside Teyla and gave a half-hearted smile. "Thank you Elder Corta, we'll try to remember that."

Corta bowed in response before turning to one of his men. "Show these ones to their rooms immediately."

The young man bowed before turning his attention to John. "Come with me, if you will."

* * *

John sat in his bed, his back against the wall, as he pulled out his book. He'd gotten it after their visit back on Earth. With _War and Peace_ finally finished, it was time for a new book, something Elizabeth had told him about. _The Count of Monte Cristo_… the story of a man who'd had everything taken away from him, forcing him to live a life of pain and suffering thanks to his best friend who'd betrayed him. He supposed it wasn't exactly the best book he should be reading, but Elizabeth had promised it ended well, so he'd decided to give it a try. After a few hours of reading he felt his eyelids slowly grow heavy as he drifted to sleep. 

"Colonel Sheppard?"

John's eyes snapped open as he felt a presence nearby. There was no mistaking the person who'd found his way into John's room. "Elder Corta… what the hell are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry Colonel, I never wanted to disturb you, but I have no choice."

"No choice? What do you mean no choice?"

Suddenly he felt Corta hit him hard, shoving him to the floor before pulling out a device and pointing it at Sheppard's crotch.

John groaned in pain for a second before jumping away before Corta could finish whatever it was he'd been up to, then quickly went on the defensive, punching Corta back. Corta pulled him down quickly and the two wrestled before John felt something stick him in his shoulder. "Wha-"

"I am sorry, Colonel. I wish there was another way…" where the last words he heard before he felt everything go black.

* * *

She knew something was going on when she heard two people talking nearby. Elizabeth sat up in bed, knowing she couldn't get out with the man standing guard nearby. She'd tried twice before, it hadn't ended very well. She could see a man standing nearby Poseion, handing something to him. "It was damaged during the fight. I got as much as I could, but I'm afraid you'll have to do this manually." 

"I see, you've done well… now help me. I will need her to stay still for this, and I doubt she will that willingly."

Finally the other man turned and Elizabeth almost gasped as she saw who it was. "Elder Corta!"

Corta walked over to her, the other guard joining him beside her bed. "Doctor Weir, I know how you must think of me at this moment, but you must understand that this is out of my hands."

Elizabeth moved to hit him when the guard beside him grabbed her and pushed her down. She tried to fight him, but he used all of his strength to keep her down. Suddenly she felt someone grab her legs and spread them apart, pulling straps over her ankles, keeping her legs in place. "No!" she screamed, looking up to see Poseion walk over, waiting as Corta bent her knees. It was at that moment that she knew what would come next. She fought as hard as she could, screaming as she felt the cold metal push against her, feeling him begin the implantation of John's sperm into her body. She wiggled and pushed against the guard, trying to get free, but all it did was force the medical tool to tear against flesh. Elizabeth cried out from the pain, but continued to fight; trying to stop him, while knowing it was in vain. Finally the cold metal was pulled away from her and Corta let go of her legs. It was done. She couldn't stop the tears from falling as the realization hit her, as she realized what they'd done. She'd never felt so violated, so taken advantage of… so used.

"Forgive me," Poseion whispered, inserting the needle into her arm. With that she felt herself lose consciousness, falling into a darkness that for once was acceptable after what they'd done to her.

* * *

"The degradation is faster than normal… the poison must have a property that breaks down the body at a more accelerated rate," Carson noticed as he looked at the more recent scan of Elizabeth's body. 

The nurse beside him frowned. "I've never seen a poison work this efficiently before. Perhaps we should take more samples of it, to better understand its function. Who knows what we could learn."

Carson nodded, turning to look at Elizabeth, accidentally knocking over a vial he'd been studying before of a strange nectar found on PX7-582. The nectar spilled out of the vial and onto Elizabeth's body, making Carson pause as he noticed the degradation of her body accelerate even further, noticeably breaking down her body. "Good god, how is that possible?"

The nurse shook her head, turning to take an active scan. "This isn't possible. There's no way that nectar could break down her body like that!"

"Could it do this in connection to the poison?"

"No! It's just not possible, the only way this could have this much of an effect on her body is if she were…" the nurse paused, looking back at Elizabeth.

Carson frowned, although he was a good doctor, Rita knew much more than him when it came to poisons and allergens. "If she were what, Rita?" Carson asked, turning to look at her.

"If she were a clone, Doctor. She could be identical to the original in everyway, but only a clone could break down this quickly when in contact with that nectar."

Carson looked back at the woman lying dead on the bed and then rushed out of the room.

"Doctor!"

"We need to contact Colonel Sheppard immediately!"

To Be Continued…

A/N: Hopefully that made sense… I kinda wrote this in one night so forgive me if it's a little confusing in some parts. I tried to simplify it, but… I'm tired and well… tired, but I'm going on vacation this weekend and I didn't want to wait to send it out. Hope you enjoyed it! Review! Press that purple button and review!


	5. Chapter 5

Second Chances

By Andie O'Neill

Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after she dies in his arm, he begins to regret what he did… but of course its to late… or is it?

A/N: I know this is somewhat short, but I wanted to end the chapter in a special way so as to prolong you're guy's suffering. :evil grin: Be afraid! Be very afraid! Naw, I'm just kiddin' with ya! But you will be getting a nice little cliffhanger for you guys to enjoy. Just thought I'd warn you in advance… but believe me, I won't wait too long to relieve your suffering! I couldn't do that to you guys! ;)

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_**Chapter Five**_

"Elizabeth," the whisper against her ear forced her to open her eyes as she looked to her left at where the voice was coming from. "It's going to be okay, Elizabeth. I'm here, everything is going to be fine," he told her, stroking her hair softly as she tried to clear her mind. It was him. John had come for her. Elizabeth let out a slow but shaky breath as his blurry image became more and more clear. His voice seemed almost distant, but it didn't matter, she knew it could be the drugs.

"John?" she spoke, her voice weak and rough.

"It's me, Elizabeth, I'm here. It's going to be just fine, I'm here now," he soothed, his soft comforting smile bringing joy and relief to her heart.

She couldn't stop the tears from falling as she reached to touch his face. She wanted to feel him, to know what the person in front of her was real. Her hand shook as she slowly brought it to his face. His eyes stared into hers, his imaging blurring and clearing by each passing second. Just as Elizabeth's hand was inches from his face, his image blurried once more, but instead of seeing his smile, she something else instead as suddenly the man she knew transformed into one of Poseion's men. Elizabeth quickly pulled her hand back, screaming as she saw him. "No! Get away from me!" she shouted, trying to push him away, still weak since the last time they'd drugged her. Where was John? Where could he have gone! He wouldn't abandon her! He wouldn't! She knew they'd had their problems, and they hadn't exactly parted on good terms, but he wouldn't leave her! She wanted him back! She _needed_ him back! Fear threatened to take control as she tried to fight the man before her. "Where's John, you bastard! Where is he!

"It's not going to hurt you, Doctor Weir! Please, I am not going to hurt you! Just relax! I need to give you this shot!" The man forced one of her arms down and pushed the needle in her sharply, forcing a cry of pain from her lips. Her heart pounded against her chest, panic rising through her as he injected the substance into her.

Elizabeth shook her head, suddenly weak, her will to fight slowing as she realized how hopeless it truly was. "No," she whispered, her eyes looking up into his. "Please."

"Doctor Weir, I won't hurt you. This is to improve chances of you being pregnant… so we don't have to do what we had to before. Do you want that to happen again?"

"No! No, no, no, no, no! Not again!" She could feel the fear inside her intensify with his words and once again she gained the strength to fight him.

He slowly pulled the needle from her. "It's okay! It's okay! I'm finished! Rest! It's okay! Just rest!" The man moved away, an apologetic look on his face as he left her. She tried to calm her breathing, but nothing would work. She was sure it was over. Sheppard wouldn't be coming for her. There was no one to save her. This was her future now. This was all that was left for her now. She tried to stop that line of thinking, but she couldn't. She was afraid, afraid of what this would mean for her future, for her life. If she were pregnant… if this would cause her to have a child, nothing else would matter, but protecting her child from these people. She wouldn't let them use her child the way they used her. Nothing else was important.

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Elder Corta watched on, feeling his eyes tear up as he watched Doctor Weir. It was wrong, what they were doing to her. His conscious was growing in strength by everything he saw, and what it was telling her, was that she didn't deserve this treatment. Not even his worst enemy would deserve the terrors they were forcing on her. His world's safety was important to him, but could he truly gain such safety by ruining the life of another? When he'd been told to hold her down so that Poseion could impregnate Doctor Weir, he'd almost been driven to tears at the sight. Today was no different. They were treating her as a science experiment, an animal to be manipulated. He wasn't sure he could do it anymore. No, he couldn't do it anymore. "I'm going to check on my village. Doctor Weir's people should be up by now… I should be attending to their needs," he told one of the guards before leaving the cave. He knew what he had to do, despite what it would cost him.

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"Colonel Sheppard!" John groaned, opening his eyes, then quickly shutting them as the light reached his eyes. "Colonel Sheppard!"

The Scottish voice resonated in his ears. What the hell! John opened his eyes once more, noticing his surrounds. "Carson?"

"Oh thank god! Bloody hell, Colonel, what in god's name were you up to! I've been callin' you forever."

John slowly got his feet, ignoring the pain in his head. How'd he get to the floor? And so far from his bed? Weird. "Sorry I… uh… was indisposed for awhile. Carson, where are you calling from?"

"Atlantis. We dialed this planet so we could contact you. It's extremely important, Colonel Sheppard!"

"What's up? What's going on?"

"It's about Elizabeth, Colonel. I know this may be a wee bit of a shock to you, Colonel Sheppard, but the woman lying in my infirmary is NOT Doctor Elizabeth Weir. She's almost a perfect replica, but after an accident we learned the truth. Whoever created her, gave a lot of attention to detail, but could not find a way to slow down the natural degradation that happens after death. Elizabeth Weir could still be alive out there, Colonel Sheppard."

John frowned, trying to wrap his mind around the news, not sure he could believe it. He had to be dreaming. This couldn't be real. Elizabeth was dead! He'd seen her die in his arms, and now Carson was telling him it wasn't really her? He could feel his whole body go numb at the news, until finally he couldn't take it anymore, and he slowly collapsed on the bed. "How is that possible? I know these people, they don't have the technology to create what you're claiming here doc."

"Believe me, Colonel, she is a clone, a very well detailed clone, but a clone nonetheless. You need to find out what's going on out there. The planet you're on is a very good start."

"I'm on it. We'll get to the bottom of this as soon as possible. In the mean time, find out everything you can on the… other Elizabeth in your infirmary. If this is true… who knows what's going on with the real Doctor Weir!"

"Aye, good luck, Colonel."

John smiled for the first time in a while. "Thanks, Sheppard out." Sheppard grabbed his clothing and hurried out of his room. He had to get his team. It was time to explore those caves.

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The collective silence, even from Rodney didn't surprise Sheppard at all. He knew the news would be a shock, especially after the emotional rollercoaster they'd all been on. Finally McKay found his voice. "Does Carson… know who could have created her? I mean, who would have that kind of technology? I don't think even the Wraith are that advanced."

"Carson's gonna run some tests to see what he can come up with, but I somehow doubt the Wraith are responsible for something like this. What would be the point?"

"They could gain information about us… it would be our downfall," Ronan offered.

"Still, this is not a tactic known by the Wraith. Someone else must be behind this… the only question is, who would gain from creating a clone after Doctor Weir?"

"That's the thing, we don't KNOW anyone that has that kind of knowledge," Rodney fought.

"Unless it's someone we don't know," John added.

Rodney frowned. "Not following you."

"Think about it… if it isn't someone we know, it has to be someone we don't know. It would have to be someone who would gain from the creation while kidnapping Elizabeth, while we have no idea who they are. And obviously they're plan was for us to think she was dead… it just seems to perfect that her death would include a weapon that would send poison through her system and fool us into believing that was the reason for her quick degradation. It makes perfect sense."

"Actually… you may be onto something," Rodney said, standing up as the realization dawned. "How is it that this planet has such large numbers? I mean, we've all been to enough worlds to recognize the signs of people who've been culled by the Wraith. Those who've had some sort of protection have always had larger numbers. The Genii hide most of their numbers from the Wraith and therefore had large numbers. The children we found with the protective dampening field had larger numbers though not quite that large considering they were killing themselves in their twenties. Why do these people have such large numbers? There are tons and tons of villages and yet none seem to have been touched by the Wraith. They live in peace… they don't experience the same terrors other's have gotten used to. They haven't been culled by the Wraith in a very long time."

"It is true that I am not used to seeing such a large quantity of people on one planet. The Wraith usually wait for larger numbers and then they begin to cull. I doubt they would let them grow this large."

"So I take it it's not the norm, huh?" Sheppard questioned.

"We certainly had large numbers," Ronan then added. "Our civilization grew to be massive by the time the Wraith attacked."

"Did you not tell me that one of the reasons for this was because of her ability to hide your numbers from them? Perhaps these have done the same?" Teyla offered.

"I don't know… but I think uncovering the clone Elizabeth's killer could shed some light on what the hell's going on around her. It's worth the try," John told them.

His team nodded in unison. "So where do we start?" McKay finally asked.

"We start by visiting the crime zone. The first time I was there it wasn't like I had much time to look around and do some detective work seeing as I though we'd all lost our expedition leader."

It was then that they noticed the four were not alone as Corta made his presence known, a solemn look on his face. "You wish to head toward the cave… I will take you there."

"I'm sure we can handle it ourselves, Elder Corta… I remember the way."

"I know these woods much better than you, Colonel Sheppard. Please, let me lead you. I promise you will not regret it," he assured them, his eyes pleading for John to agree.

John hesitated before nodding. "Lead the way."

"Thank you, Colonel… please, come with me."

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"Sir, we've just received the test results regarding to the child we our trying to create," one of the guards informed Poseion, standing before him, a serious expression on his face.

Elizabeth did her best to clear the fog from all the drugs and focus on the guard's words.

"And is she pregnant?" Poseion asked, going straight to the point.

Doctor Weir strained her ears to listen to his answer, needing to know more than anything in the world. Either answer she knew would affect her. She needed to know what was in store. She needed to know what would be her fate. She didn't want to experience implantation again. She wasn't sure she could go through it, but on the other hand… if she was pregnant. Elizabeth wasn't sure either answer would be good in the end. Weir watched as the guard raised his eyes to connect with Poseions, just before he spoke his answer….

To Be Continued…

A/N: Is she or isn't she? What will Corta do? Will John find Elizabeth? Stay tuned for those answers and more… but first… REVIEW:D It's what I live for… wow, isn't that just pathetic? Oh well…. :shrugs: Review!


	6. Chapter 6

Second Chances

By Andie O'Neill

Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after she dies in his arm, he begins to regret what he did… but of course its to late… or is it?

* * *

Chapter Six

"Tell me she's alright," John whispered as he walked along side the man, an almost desperation in his voice.

Corta turned his head only a bit before looking straight. "She is alive… I can not speak for the condition you will find her in."

John closed his eyes, trying to take hold of his anger. He knew this man was trying to help, but he couldn't stop the feelings that swelled inside of him, his need to protect Elizabeth was strong. Stronger than anything he'd ever known. She was more than a leader to him, more than a friend. She was in many ways his soul. From the beginning her trust in him had astounded John. She'd given him a second chance, given him a family, a home on Atlantis. He owed her everything for all she done for him, only instead he'd pushed her away as if she meant nothing to him. She deserved more. She deserved his devotion, his love, his willingness to give his heart to her the way she'd given hers to him. He'd hurt her, and he knew he'd never forgive himself for that. Still, even if it took his life, he would save her. He would protect her. Corta had taken her away from him and left her to people conducting experiments as if she were a lab rat. The thought of what they could be doing to her was tearing him up inside. It was his fault. "What did you people do to her?" he asked through clenched teeth, pushing his self-hatred to the back of his mind. It wasn't entirely his fault… and those who were also responsible deserved whatever fate gave them… as long as it was in the form of him killing each one of them with his bare hands.

"My people have done nothing. They know nothing of the evil your leader has endured. I fear if anyone should be blamed, it should be me. I knew what they planned to do and helped them succeed. They promised protection for my people from the Wraith. I could not resist what peace this deal would bring this world. I thought it was worth the loss you and you're men would face when they took her from you."

"Then why are you helping us?"

"Some prices are simply too high. My people despise the Wraith, yet what they do is not out of pleasure, but hunger. They kill for food just as we do. They wish to survive. The only difference is our ability to love, to forge together and show the kindness we rarely see or feel in this twisted galaxy. By going along with this deal I will be no better than those we despise."

John frowned, looking over at Corta, unsure what to think. "By doing this you are most likely dooming you're people to continual attack by the Wraith."

Corta smiled, shaking his head. "I would rather die tomorrow, than live a thousand years with the pain I have caused you. My people would say the same. We are a people of peace, of kindness in a galaxy of suffering and pain. We cannot go forward, if the means for getting where we wish was through lies and betrayal. We would simply be fooling ourselves into believing we'd gone ahead. I am a man of conscious, though at times it has taken me a while to accept it. She does not deserve to be treated as she has been. When this is over and I have given her back to you, I ask that you show mercy when deciding how I can repay you for this evil I have done to Doctor Weir and all those who care for her."

"Elder Corta, if you help bring her back, you're debt will have been repaid," John assured him before walking ahead a bit, knowing the man beside him was one of honor, despite the mistakes he'd made. Sheppard didn't hold him responsible for Elizabeth's suffering. Those who'd forced this upon him were to blame, and he would see that they paid for it. He just hoped she was okay. It disturbed him how close they had been to leaving her behind forever.

* * *

Posieon sighed, wiping the sweat from her face as she struggled against the restraints. "This would be so much easier if you would stop resisting me."

Elizabeth just fought harder, trying to move past all the drugs that had been pumped into her system. She refused to back down. It didn't matter anymore that she would most likely not succeed. She wouldn't make this easy for him. "Don't touch me!" she shouted, holding on to all the anger in her heart.

Posieon stopped what he was doing and dropped the rag in the bowl of water, putting it away and returning with a needle in hand. "Very well, but I'm afraid I cannot let you damage yourself further. Your wrists are bleeding… you won't eat… you even refuse to sleep. If you refuse to work with us, then I will simply have to force my will upon you by other means." Posieon held Elizabeth down just as she fought to get away from him, screaming at the top of her lungs as the needle went into her skin.

* * *

More drugs. Elizabeth felt the liquid flow through her system, and felt the tears fall as he walked away from her. It was a nightmare she feared would never end. Slowly her vision blurred as the drug began to impair her judgment. It was then that she looked up to see John's face. "You're safe now, Elizabeth. I'm here."

Elizabeth shook her head. "No! Stop it!" Closing her eyes, she tried to force the hallucination from her mind.

"Everything's gonna be fine," the hallucination assured her.

She knew it wasn't real when she opened her eyes once more to see the face of one of her captures. "Please… no," she said weakly.

The man undid her restraints, assured that she wouldn't be going anywhere with the effects of the drug. "I must tend to your wrists, just relax, Elizabeth. I do not plan on hurting you."

Elizabeth just shook her head slowly, too weak to say anything as he took her right arm and cleaned it, wrapping it tightly around her wrist. Finally she looked away, trying to calm her breathing. She was losing her mind… she wasn't sure how much more she could take.

* * *

"Did you hear that?" Ronan asked, looking over at Teyla.

"I did," John answered; frozen at the sound of a scream… it had to be Elizabeth.

Corta swore an angered look on his face. "He's been pumping her with drugs to force her to cooperate! We must hurry!"

John nodded and followed behind Corta as they hurried through the sacred woods, drawing closer and closer to the cave, and Elizabeth.

* * *

"Sir! Sir! The men report Doctor Weir's people are coming here! They're being led by Elder Corta!"

Posien cursed. "Ready the men! Tell them to resist, but if they cannot be stopped, they must fall back inside the cave. I have a plan."

"Should I take Doctor Weir deeper into the cave?"

"No! Leave her there! We'll use her as bait."

* * *

"Down!" Sheppard called as he saw movement nearby the cave. Just then they heard the gunfire directed at them, piercing through leaves and bark too close for comfort. "Damn," John pulled up his P-90 and began to fire as the others followed, shooting almost blindly since those protecting the cave seemed good at camouflage.

It seemed like hours before they rushed into the cave all of the sudden, leaving John and his team confused. "Posieon has something in mind," Corta told him. "He would never let his men stop fighting unless that was so."

"Trap?" John asked.

"Trap," Ronan confirmed.

Sheppard shrugged. "Well, at least we'll know it's there," he said before getting up slowly, crouched down in case anyone attacked.

"That's suicide! If you know it's a trap why do you ignore this!" Corta asked in surprise.

"Because they have a death wish," Rodney explained.

"Spring the trap," Ronan told Corta. "We know there is one, so we will be far more careful than if we knew nothing… and possibly we may spring that trap, expose it."

"It's the only way to know what the trap is. We'll never know unless we go inside… we have no other choice. She's obviously in there… we have to get Elizabeth."

Rodney rolled his eyes. "In other words… death wish," he mumbled, as he followed John and Ronan inside the cave. Corta paused at the mouth of the cave before walking inside. Teyla took up the rear, smiling at Rodney as she walked inside.

* * *

When they entered the room they could feel the creepy chill in the air. Gone. Everyone… they'd just left. It was then that John saw her, and ceased to care about anything else. "Elizabeth!" Sheppard ran to her side. She was chained to the strange bed, much like a medical bed. "Elizabeth?" She was awake.

When she looked at him, her eyes when wide and she struggled against the chains. "No more! No more drugs! Please!" Elizabeth screamed, trying to move away from him.

"Elizabeth! No! It's me! No more drugs! It's me! It's really me!" he tried to tell her. He tried to reach out to her, touch her face, but she moved away from him in fear.

"No! Don't! No more! Please! God please, don't!" she said, tears falling down her face.

John pushed down his anger and fear for what had been done for her and finally grabbed her arm, forcing her to look at him. "It's me Elizabeth! Listen to me! I've come to save you!" he almost shouted, holding on to her arm tightly.

Elizabeth stared at him wide-eyed, until finally her other hand moved up slowly and touched his face and she cried hard. John pulled her to him as the tears streamed down her face, relief that he was real, that she was safe, that he'd come.

"It's okay…" he told her, holding her tight. "Everything's going to be alright. I'm here."

So focused on Elizabeth, John failed to hear the rest of his team as well as Corta fall to the ground, a dart in their necks leaving only him. Just as Sheppard kissed Elizabeth's forehead, trying to calm her he felt the pinch in his neck, his whole body frozen for a second before he fell to the ground unconscious.

Elizabeth looked down before hearing Posieon's voice. "Shame… he could have really saved you," he told her, walking towards Sheppard. "The drugs don't seem to be doing the trick, Elizabeth… maybe he will," he told her with a smug smile as he looked up at her.

Elizabeth shook her head and once again struggled against the restraints. "No! Don't touch him! John! Wake up, John! Wake up!" His body lay still on the ground as Posieon pulled the dart from his neck. "Wake up!"

To Be Continued….


	7. Chapter 7

Second Chances

By Andie O'Neill

Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after she dies in his arm, he begins to regret what he did… but of course its to late… or is it?

A/N: Sorry for the evil cliffy, but I tried to hurry up with the next chapter. So here you are. Don't forget to review:)

* * *

Chapter Seven

Before he could even open his eyes he could feel someone cleaning a cut on his forehead, making him wince. "Ouch."

"Hold still."

"What happened?" he asked, opening his eyes to stare into hers.

"You were unconscious. They shot you with something, it was a dart. They obviously knew you were coming. The guards threw you to the ground, that's how you got the cut. They sent me in here to take care of you."

He felt his hands tighten into fists as he tried to resist what every bone in his body screamed for. "What about the others?"

"Their in a separate cell," she told him, cleaning the wound before finally putting on the gauze and taping it to his forehead. "Poseion won't let me see them." Elizabeth paused, suddenly realizing how hard he was looking at her. He knew it had to be noticeable, but he just couldn't look away. She'd been dead god dammit! He'd watched her die in his arms and now here she was taking care of him, alive even if she wasn't exactly well. "John?"

John wrapped his arms around her, holding her to him hard. Before when he'd seen her, his whole focus had been to assure her that he was real, now it was his turn. He had to know she was real.

"Uh John… your cutting off circulation."

Realizing how hard he was holding her, he let go slowly, not really wanting to. He just wanted to hold her forever, touch her, kiss her, tell her all the things he hadn't been able to tell her before. "Sorry, it's just… we all thought you were dead. I watched you die in my arms." John moved his hand to stroke her cheek gently before brushing back a curl. "We all thought we'd lost you." It wasn't until her eyes closed that he realized what he was doing, and forced his hand to fall back to his side.

"I know... I know all about the clone. Poseion told me." Elizabeth stood up, putting some distance between them, to Sheppard's dismay. "He'll use you against me. He'll use you till he gets what he wants."

"What does he want?"

Elizabeth sighed. "To break me. It's complicated. Let's just say he has a plan to destroy the Wraith and any other enemy that stands in his way, and that plan involves my cooperation. He's an Ancient, John. Somehow he took human form again, while keeping much of the knowledge he'd had while ascended. You may know him better as Posiedon."

"Posiedon?! Greek mythology? He created Atlantis."

"Apparently he was the architect. He built it as well as other cities similar to Atlantis."

"You've got to be kidding me! We're going against an Ancient?! Exactly how the hell does he plan to destroy the Wraith?"

Elizabeth seemed to hesitate before looking away. "He wants to create the perfect genetic fighting machine. A being beyond anything we have ever known with all the Ancient knowledge downloaded into it's mind as well as genetic modifications for him or her to not only assimilate the data, but also created specifically to kill."

"In other words… a super genius with super powers. How does he plan on doing that?"

Again Elizabeth hesitated. "His plan was to impregnate me and genetically manipulate the unborn child while it's still developing."

"What?!"

"I think he may have even tried this before. In Greek mythology, it's said Posiedon actually rapped two women. One had a son… Atlas. It may be that he forced these women to become pregnant in order to create this perfect genetically altered child. Only it never worked, and now after leaving his place as an ascended being, he's chosen me as a vessel for his continued work. He'll use you against me, force me to surrender. He's been messing with my mind; pumping drugs into my system… doing whatever he can to break me, to gain control. If I'm to carry his creation, he'll need my cooperation."

Sheppard sighed, rubbing his forehead to ease the ache there. "So what do we do? We can't let him impregnate you."

Weir frowned, folding her arms as she turned around, hesitating before finally taking a breath. "John… it's too late."

"It's not too late, we'll find a way." John got to his feet and turned her to face him, pulling her back into his arms. "I'll find a way out of this. You just have to hang on. I won't let him hurt you, Elizabeth. I'll protect you."

Elizabeth shook her head, resisting the tears that threatened to fall. "No John, you don't understand," she told him, holding his gaze, opening her mouth to explain.

Just then the guards walked over to the bars. "Step away from her, Mr. Sheppard."

Sheppard looked up, his anger growing with each second. Finally he moved her behind him. "I won't let you take her."

One of the guards just frowned before opening the bar door, a dart gun in hand. "I'm afraid you don't have a choice."

John moved to attack him, getting in a punch just as the other guard jumped in, throwing John off the first guard and onto the floor. John watched as Elizabeth tried to run over to him, but the second guard got to her first, grabbing her from behind while the first guard stood up, staring down at John just before kicking him in the stomach. John yelped in pain, groaning as he rolled over.

"Next time I suggest you do as your told," he told John calmly before kicking him in the back.

John cried out once more, watching as the two guards left the cell, Elizabeth dragged out with them despite her struggles. "John!"

Sheppard moaned, before he felt things start to fade, until finally he was enveloped in darkness.

* * *

Elizabeth stared up at the cave walls, trying to cancel out everything else around her while Poseion and his guards continued with their examination. It had been hours since they'd taken her from John. She could feel a stray tear fall down her face, but she paid it no mind. She closed her eyes, ignoring the whispers around her as they took their scans. The chains were tighter than usual, restraining her from moving once again. She could feel the pressure as their sensor equipment pushed inside, and Elizabeth held her eyes closed even tighter than before. "Well Elizabeth, it looks like our efforts weren't in vain. You child seems to be developing nicely. We've sped up its gestation time… in less than two months your child will be fully grown."

Elizabeth gritted her teeth, fisting her hands as she tried to drown him out. She tried to imagine John's face, smiling back at her. There was no cave; no child developing inside her… she was back on Atlantis. She was a leader again. She tried to imagine eating lunch with John, Rodney, and Teyla. She tried to imagine card games with Colonel Caldwell. Anything was better than what she went through now.

"You know, Elizabeth, you really should have told John about his future child. After all, this little miracle is his too."

Elizabeth's fists tightened even further to the point that Elizabeth could feel warm liquid running through the cracks of her hands, the barely noticeable pain in her hands reminding her that her fantasies were just that… fantasies… old memories of the past. Finally the examination was over and one of the guards unchained her legs and arms and then handed her pants and underwear. It was humiliating, but by now she'd found ways to get through it… just barely. She wasn't lying when she'd told John just how close she was to breaking. Nothing would ever be the same after this… but then again… how could it be? She was having a child for god's sake! That alone could change her future forever, but this experience… this nightmare was just as life changing. Nothing could ever be the same again. She could never be the same after this.

"Escort Doctor Weir back to her cell… I'm sure Colonel Sheppard is quite worried right about now."

The guard nodded and pushed her forward. Elizabeth started at Poseion, watching his amused look before he walked off. With everything she'd gone through, she'd known she'd be changed, but what terrified her most… was how strong the urge to kill that man with her bare hands was.

Just as soon as the guard threw her inside the cell, John was beside her. "Elizabeth! You were gone for over an hour! What happened? Did they…."

She could tell he didn't want to finish the sentence, but she knew exactly what he was asking. "They were examining me. Medical tests. We have to get out of here," Elizabeth said, keeping her hands fisted to hide the cuts on her palms from John.

"I've been working on that. More than likely another team will be coming soon to find us. Major Lorne's a smart guy… he'll find us. In the meantime… we both have to fight these guys. If there's an opportunity to escape, no hesitation… we take it."

Elizabeth nodded, moving her hand to her stomach as she moved to sit down, wincing. She still hadn't healed… down there, since the last time they'd had to hold her down, the time when they'd first inserted John's DNA into her system in order to induce pregnancy. She'd fought hard despite the pain, but she was starting to think it had been a bad idea… certainly hadn't helped any.

"Don't worry," John spoke, sitting down beside her. "We'll get out of here… together. I won't let them use you as just another one of their experiments."

Elizabeth looked away. "You don't have a choice in the matter, John. Neither of us do. Poseion won't stop until he get's what he wants. There's a reason why you're still alive. If I don't cooperate he'll kill you and the others… I know it."

"Elizabeth, don't talk like that. We've been in these situations before… we'll be fine, you'll be fine."

"We've never been in a situation like this. That's the problem. John, there's something you need to know…."

To Be Continued….

A/N: Hey! At least it's another chapter! I know technically it's a cliffhanger, but at least it isn't as bad as the last one:D And remember… kill me and you'll never see the end! Bwhahahahahaha. :evil smile: lol Oh and sorry it's so short, just trying to build you guys up until it's climatic end… :)


	8. Chapter 8

Second Chances

By Andie O'Neill

Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after she dies in his arm, he begins to regret what he did… but of course its to late… or is it?

A/N: The moment of truth, how will John react to what Elizabeth has to tell him. I also have a bit of a surprise in store in this chapter so enjoy:)

* * *

Chapter Eight

John Sheppard could always tell when something was seriously wrong, especially when it came to Elizabeth. He couldn't help but stare as Elizabeth hesitated, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. "God John, how do you tell someone something you've barely had time to accept yourself?"

John knew she was struggling. Whatever she needed to tell him, it was big, very big. Sheppard moved an arm around her, pulling her to him as the tears began to fall. "It's okay, Elizabeth… don't cry."

"It's not fair, John, god, it's not fair that you have to be pulled into this mess!"

"It's not fair that you've been pulled into this either, Elizabeth." John moved in front of her, forcing her to look at him, more tears falling down her face. "We're in this together… no matter what happens. Whatever it is you need to tell me, I can take it. We'll figure it out… whatever it is; we can figure it out… together."

Elizabeth sighed, shaking her head. "He's already impregnated me. John… when he took me… he was doing an examination of the child… I'm pregnant."

Almost as soon as the words were out of her mouth John could feel the anger boil inside him, a rage he hadn't felt since Koyla had threatened to take Elizabeth's life. John slowly stood, then turned to the bars, kicking them fiercely despite the pain. "That god damn bastard! I'll kill him!"

"John?"

John turned back around, and suddenly he couldn't breathe as he ran back to her. "Did he hurt you? Did he… did he rape you, Elizabeth? You have to tell me, what did he do to you?"

"He didn't rape me, John. He didn't use his own DNA. In order to impregnate me… he used someone else's DNA… someone who had the gene strong enough to pass on that gift to this child… he used your DNA, John. This child is yours."

John's eyes widened then as he stared at her, unsure what to say, what to do, hell, he wasn't even sure he'd be able to speak by this point. It felt as if he'd just been slapped hard in the face… really hard. "You mean… you mean he…." He couldn't even speak, couldn't say it.

"He implanted your DNA in me… your the father," she told him, her voice shaking as she put a hand to her stomach.

Before he even realized he'd moved he felt his arms wrap around her as he pulled her to him, closing his eyes. "Oh my god… Elizabeth… I'm so sorry," he whispered, letting her go so he could look into her eyes. "Damn, Elizabeth… I didn't… god… are you okay? I mean, he just examined the baby right? He didn't hurt it? Jesus Christ… I'm gonna be… a… a…a-"

"A father," she interrupted as she captured his gaze. Just then they heard the bar doors open, the same two guards standing there with matching smirks on each of their faces.

"On your feet Colonel Sheppard… you too Doctor Weir. Poseion wants to speak with you both."

John turned to look at them. His instinct telling him to fight.

"No John, we can't risk it," she whispered, moving a comforting hand to his shoulder before he did something rash. He supposed his body parts would thank him later if he just did what they told him to do….

John turned back to look at Elizabeth, kissing her forehead gently. "I'll protect you," he whispered to her. "I won't let him hurt you or the baby, I promise."

Elizabeth smiled at that. "And whose gonna protect you?" she asked.

"Who knows… obviously someone must like me a lot considering I'm still alive after everything. We'll find a way out of this… we always do."

"I told you… he'll use you against me."

"Don't let him."

"If he believes you mean nothing to me… you won't be of any use."

John gave her a comforting smirk at that. "Elizabeth, don't worry about me. I can take care of myself."

"No John, you can't. You do know what this man is capable of. Believe me, I know," she told him, and from the look in her eyes he could tell she wasn't kidding.

John slowly moved a hand down, taking her hand into his, giving her his best smile. "Come on, the guards are waiting, and something tells me they're not the most patient couple of guys."

"Okay," she finally said, a smile slowly appearing on her face. He could tell it was forced, she was putting on a brave face, he'd seen the look a hundred times before.

The guards parted, watching as Sheppard looked away, but made no move to let go of Elizabeth's hand as they left the cell together to meet whatever fate had in store.

* * *

"Please, Colonel Sheppard, Doctor Weir, take a seat. There is much we must discuss." Poseion raised his hand to indicate where he'd like them to sit, when he saw the hesitation he immediately frowned. "I insist."

Finally the two sat down, both uneasy.

Poseion took a step forward, staring down at them, noticing the Colonel was holding Weir's hand tightly in his own. "Good, I see you finally told Colonel Sheppard the truth. Excellent, it will make what I have to say far easier."

"And exactly what is it you wanna tell us Poseion?" John asked his voice defensive.

Poseion raised an eyebrow, but chose not to humor him. "I have tried everything Doctor Weir to make you see reason… almost everything. I believe it's time you hear the truth…. Tell me, when you first came to Atlantis… did you ever meet an old woman? She was in one of our stasis pods when we abandoned Atlantis."

Elizabeth's eyes widened. "How did you-"

"Janus was a good friend of mine. While I served on Atlantis I worked mostly in the field of medicine. Science and medicine were always my greatest loves. It was I who treated your alternate self after she was thrown back in time along with Colonel Sheppard and Doctor Zelenka. Only your counterpart came through it alive."

"She told us about what happened. Janus created a time travel device, using one of the jumpers," John told him.

Elizabeth's eyes had not left Poseion since his first confession. "You knew Janus?"

Poseion smiled, nodding. "Janus and I shared a deep love for the city I'd created. His experiments were always meant to protect Atlantis, as well as our people as a whole. We knew the threat of the Wraith was far too great. Unfortunately others did not share our opinion that sometimes rules must be ignored for the greater good. Because of this Janus had to work in secret. Soon enough he left not long after he completed the time ship. No one ever saw or heard from him again."

"What does that have to do with what you did to Elizabeth?!" John asked, barely containing his anger with the Ancient.

Poseion narrowed his eyes, looking over at Sheppard. "When Doctor Weir came to Atlantis many were astounded and excited at the prospect of Atlantis surviving for so long, including Janus and I. While Elizabeth was in my care I was able to have quite a few conversations about her timeline. When I was informed that the Earth expedition would reach Atlantis only to watch it be destroyed by the ocean around them, Janus and I knew something had to be done. Janus ensured that Atlantis would survive when time repeated itself, changing the course of our future, but I knew… even with Atlantis being preserved that it would not last once the Wraith learned of its existence. So Janus and I made a plan."

"A plan? You mean to create an advanced being?" Elizabeth asked.

Poseion nodded. "When we reached Earth Janus worked hard to find a person that could give us the correct results, but his ways were taking far too long. I knew if we were ever to stop the Wraith we would need more than what he was trying to provide. Unfortunately Janus did not agree with my assessment. We parted ways."

"Somehow I'm not surprised," John muttered. Elizabeth moved a hand to his thigh in the hopes to calm him before he said something stupid.

"My research was fruitless, nothing I did worked. Even before we had all be stranded to Earth I had been working hard to reach my goal. The closest child was Ataris. I used my own DNA to create him, my son. It was he who named the city I created Atlantis."

"Atlas," Elizabeth whispered, remembering some of those history classes her mother had forced her to take in high school.

Poseion simply cocked his head curious, before looking away. "Janus on the other hand had made a break through in his research. It involved finding the only one he believed could truly help us. A young child. Her mother had been working along side Janus for a number of years, he'd tracked her down, no one had understood why. The council was furious. We weren't supposed to be meddling in human affairs, but thankfully Janus barely got a slap on the hand for his breach in protocol. The woman was widowed; no one believed his actions would affect anything. Janus married her about a month after she had the child, a daughter, Amadea, from her first husband. It wasn't until his disappearance that I learned what his interest in Minerva and Amadea. Elizabeth… they are your ancestors."

Elizabeth froze at that, obviously unsure how to react. "Wha… what?"

"Janus implanted a gene he'd been developing in Amadea, she would as well as her offspring develop much faster than any normal human or Ancient as you call us. She would be unique, an improvement although subtle. It was Janus' hope to use the time ship me made to jump into the future once he'd inserted this gene into Amadea, but he never made it to this timeline. I have yet to learn why this is so. It wasn't until I went over his research that I realized what he was trying to do. The reasons I failed in the past had much to do with advancement. Our people as well as humanity had yet to advance to the level we would need to create what we were trying to create. Janus believed only by speeding up evolution if you will, could we succeed, and he was right, Doctor Weir. You are indeed advanced, and your child will be more incredible than you ever imagined possible."

To Be Continued….

A/N:D Didn't see that coming did you?! I really thought it was important to explain why Poseion would choose Elizabeth for his plans, and this is my explanation, hopefully it all made sense! More to come as soon as possible!!!!!


	9. Chapter 9

Second Chances

By Andie O'Neill

Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after she dies in his arm, he begins to regret what he did… but of course its to late… or is it?

A/N: When an escape is in the works it puts one of their own in danger, and John may just lose one of the most important things in his life…. Sorry this is coming so late, I wanted to have it in a while ago but life got in the way! My dad's been in and out of the hospital for a couple months so I really couldn't get it together! Anyway, sorry guys, hope you enjoy! Please review!!!!!!!

* * *

Chapter Nine

"Is that the last one?" Rodney asked, worried as he looked over at all the knives currently either imbedded in the wall or lying on the floor near the release button Ronan had been targeting for almost an hour. He'd been told by Teyla that it hadn't been the first time they'd been in such a position, but McKay hadn't been all that inclined to know when that had been so. He just wanted to get out of the cell keeping them caged.

"How many times are you gonna ask me that?" Ronan asked in annoyance.

"Yes or no!"

"No! It's not the last, now shut up and let me concentrate!"

"Hey, if we don't get out of here who knows what that crazy guy will do to us! We haven't seen John or Elizabeth since we were shoved in here!"

"Rodney, you must calm down. Colonel Sheppard and Doctor Weir will be fine, but we are of no use in here. Let Ronan concentrate on hitting the release button so we may escape."

Finally Rodney closed his mouth, a worried look on his face as he watched Ronan miss once more. Unfortunately he couldn't keep quiet forever. "Oh god, we're gonna die in here aren't we?!"

* * *

"Wait, so you're actually telling me Janus' plan all along was to come to the future and impregnate Elizabeth?!" John asked, surprised. When the… other Elizabeth had spoke of Janus, he'd always thought the man was a good guy, but if what Poseion was saying was true, it seemed he was just as much a snake as Poseion.

"Of course not. Janus never was strong enough to do what is necessary. The only reason Amadea was given the gene was because Minerva saw the importance of his research and willingly helped make it possible. I suspect he would only have done what I have done with your consent."

John could tell Elizabeth was mad, furious. "And I would have HELPED him if he'd asked what you're asking of me! You actually think you'll get away with this Poseion? You're not! I won't let you use my child for your own purposes! You've already proved that you're capable of terrible things, I have no doubt you'd abuse this child to do you're bidding just as you've done with me!"

Poseion paused, glaring at her. "If you do not work _with_ me, Elizabeth, I'll have no reason to keep you alive once the child is born, and make no mistake, I have no problems with eliminating you, nor do I have any problems with keeping you here till you're death after I have the child. The choice is yours."

"And what about John? What about the others that were with him?" she asked, suddenly afraid for them as she heard the coldness in his voice. It wasn't an empty threat, and they both knew it. Poseion would kill her if she chose not to work with him. The hairs on the back of John's neck stood up.

"If you are willing to stay and work with me to raise this child, I will let them go. If not, they will be kept here until I have the child and then you will all be killed. The choice is yours. Chose."

Elizabeth froze, looking over at John. John shook his head, knowing exactly what she was thinking. She always put the well being of others ahead of herself. "Elizabeth no," he whispered.

"I have no choice," she whispered back.

"You heard him, you do. We'll get out of here. Don't give up."

"I'm sorry, John."

"No!"

"I'll help you, just let them go," she said, a broken look on her face.

"Elizabeth! You can't!" John fought.

"She's made her choice, Sheppard. She's being smart, do not corrupt her. This child will need it's mother to remain strong, it's for the good of this galaxy, for this universe." Suddenly Poseion turned to look at the guard nearby. "Go get the others. Elizabeth has chosen to stay."

The guard gave one nod before turning to leave.

John frowned, looking over at Elizabeth. He had to think of something, quick. He couldn't let Elizabeth go through with this. They were getting out together or not at all. "I want to stay with her!" John finally said after a second.

Elizabeth turned to look at him, a look of surprise written all over her face. "John, no!"

John looked over at her. "Oh, you can do it but I can't?! That's my child! I'm not leaving you two behind."

"Sheppard, just because I used your DNA does not automatically mean you get to make demands. I won't risk you corrupting the child."

"I won't! I just… I just want to watch it grow up. That's my child, I won't abandon it."

Poseion smiled coldly before nodding his consent. "Guard, leave us, gather the prisoners."

The guard bowed before hurrying to gather John's team from their cells, he could only hope Poseion would truly free them and not kill them all.

* * *

Ronan frowned when the guard walked toward their cell only to notice the knives sticking in the wall near the release button. "Crap," he muttered, something he'd gotten from John during his time on Atlantis.

"What is the meaning of this?!" the guard exclaimed.

"Oh great! This is just great!" whispered Rodney. "Now we really are going to die! I would think you were better with your aim, Ronan!"

More guards came behind him. The first guard, who was obviously their leader glared into the cell. "Get them out of there! We must report this to Poseion!"

"Now's our chance, ready yourselves," Ronan whispered calmly as he discreetly pulled a knife from his back. How he'd managed to hide that one, Rodney would never know, but in the end that really didn't matter.

As soon as Ronan warned them the guards opened the door and walked inside. Before they could react Ronan threw the knife which pierced the first guard in the head, making Rodney wince. "Oh so now suddenly you have good aim?!" he shouted.

"Quiet!" shouted Teyla as she tackled the other guard. The lead guard ran inside the cell only to be knocked down by Ronan and stabbed in the chest with yet another knife Ronan had in his hair.

"Grab their guns and move out! We need to find Doctor Weir and Sheppard!" Ronan told them.

"Oh and who made you leader of this outfit?!" McKay fought.

Teyla rolled her eyes as she followed Ronan out of the cell, Corta following behind her.

Rodney frowned before grabbing one of Ronan's knives which had been thrown into the wall and hurried from behind. "Why do I have to have the knife? I want a gun! Hello! Are you two listening?!"

"Shut up!" Ronan shouted.

* * *

Elizabeth frowned when she heard shots being fired from nearby. Poseion looked back near the entrance, his gun at the ready for whatever was going on. John stared at her before turning to look at Poseion. He was distracted. Making a quick decision John jumped over to him, grabbing for the gun.

Poseion growled in anger, fighting for the power as the pushed and pulled. Then suddenly the gun fired. John froze in shock as he looked over at Elizabeth who immediately fell to the ground. "Elizabeth!"

* * *

"Elizabeth dear? Elizabeth?"

It sounded like Carson, but she couldn't really tell. It sounded so faint, as if the person were calling from a distance. Where was she? What happened?

"Elizabeth, it's me… Carson. You need to wake up."

Carson, it was him. Elizabeth tried to open her heavy eyes, putting some effort into it before they finally obeyed her, then searched the room before they rested on Doctor Beckett. It was hard to focus, but she was strong enough to handle it… for now. "C.. Carson?"

Carson smiled. "Elizabeth, how do you feel? You've been out of it for quite a while!"

"How long?" she asked, her voice barely a whisper with how weak she felt.

"Days. We were pretty worried, but then again I suppose it's a step up from being pronounced dead," he tried to joke. He looked tired, worn out, as he stared down at her, not even really smiling thought to a stranger he'd look like he was. His eyes told her he was upset about something.

"What happened?" she asked, her strength beginning to return to an extent.

"You were shot… in the abdomen. Colonel Sheppard's team rescued you and took you back here after subduing the man holding you. Colonel Sheppard killed Poseion," he told her softly. He was looking more and more tired by the minute. Suddenly everything clicked as she looked up at him. "What… what about the baby?"

Carson hesitated, looking away.

"Carson? Is my baby alright?"

Still he said nothing. "Elizabeth… I'm so sorry."

And with those words, Elizabeth's heart stopped and she knew what he was going to say.

To Be Contined…

A/N: I'm sure you know what's coming next! Sorry for all this angst, but it's just so much fun! lol Don't hate me yet! There's a happy ending in here somewhere… I think! lol Sorry this is so short, the next chapter will be much longer!


	10. Chapter 10

Second Chances

By Andie O'Neill

Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after she dies in his arm, he begins to regret what he did… but of course its to late… or is it?

A/N: They've lost the baby, Poseion is dead, and now John and Elizabeth must face the truth about what's happened and learn how to deal with it together, or they may never survive it…. I promised angst… that's all I've got to say… well that and PLEASE REVIEW! Lol I gotta warn you guys though, this chapter in the end get's just a little darker than I'd originally intended, but it had to be done, you'll see why soon enough! Just remember… I WARNED YOU!!!!!!!!!

* * *

Chapter Ten

"You know Carson, I'm a little tired of repeating this everyday," John muttered standing at the infirmary doors.

"Colonel, you know I can't let you see her. She doesn't want to see you or anyone else and it's up to me to respect her wishes."

John rolled his eyes, barely controlling his anger at the situation. He wanted to hit something… to hit Carson. He wanted to scream and yell and fight until he was too exhausted to think. He was frustrated, confused, and just a little bit scared at the situation he now faced. Elizabeth wouldn't speak to him; his friends barely knew what to say to him. He was responsible… for all of it, and he knew it. Instead of getting into yet another verbal confrontation with the Doctor he slowly backed away, and left.

* * *

At first he thought he'd go to his room, but when he soon walked past it, choosing instead to enter the transporter, selecting one of the upper levels, a place he usually used for exercise considering how massive the area was. Almost every morning he'd gone running with Ronan to keep in shape, at the top of his game, but lately with what happened it seemed not even that was available to him. Suddenly Ronan seemed awkward around him, as if he were walking on egg shells, everyone was walking on egg shells around him, waiting for him to blow. He'd just lost his unborn child, and he was responsible, not too many knew what that was like. John ran as soon as he reached the catwalks, rushing through faster than he'd ever run before. It was as if he'd just suddenly gotten a burst of energy.

He ran faster and faster, trying to outrun the dark cloud that followed him. He ran from his problems, from his fears, from his guilt. He ran from everything, going even faster as he felt his pain trying to catch up with him. If he could go just a little bit faster, maybe… just maybe he'd be okay. He ran through the catwalk as if a monster was chasing him, and perhaps a monster was chasing him, a dark monster he'd created, it's only desire being to swallow him whole. But his legs were beginning to strain and sweat was pouring down his face. He was worn out, but he kept going, pushing himself harder and harder despite the pain. He refused to slow down even as his body resisted, begging him to stop. He kept going, his mind filled with the ache of his knees, the stress on his lungs. He couldn't stop. It was as if he were a man possessed, different from the man he'd been before.

Hours passed and it wasn't long before his legs finally gave out and he fell into a boneless mess on the catwalk floor. His lungs gasped for air, his heart racing faster than it ever had before. John closed his eyes, passing out from the pain of his run and his unfortunate collapse.

* * *

Carson was well known as a man who worried about his friends. Danger was a part of life on Atlantis and it was well within his rights to be worried about the people he cared about. Elizabeth was upset. She tried to hide it from him, but he knew better. He knew she was dealing with loss the best way she knew how. John Sheppard on the other hand was far more dangerous. He never faced his problems. At least Elizabeth knew when to admit she was dealing with something. Carson had even talked her into speaking with Doctor Heightmeyer, but John Sheppard was different. He refused to be weak, as if he'd been programmed as a child to keep all issues in. He acted as if he was handling things, but the problem was he never handled a thing. He locked it away every time. Carson had seen it done many times before, it was a hazard no one seemed to know about, a danger far worse than a gun shot wound.

Doctor Beckett sighed as he walked into Rodney McKay's office. "Rodney, got a second?"

Rodney looked up from his work. "What?"

Carson sighed, it was sad that he had to resort to this, but it was worth a try. "I'm worried about Colonel Sheppard."

Rodney frowned, looking back down at his laptop. "Why?"

"What do you mean why?! The man just lost his unborn child! I know he feels responsible and no matter how hard I try Elizabeth refuses to even see him… or anyone else for that matter!"

McKay sighed, closing his laptop. "And?! What exactly to you really think you can do about it?! We're talking about Colonel Sheppard here."

"We can try can't we?"

"We? What do you expect ME to do?!"

"Oh I don't know, maybe TALK to him?!" Carson shot back angrily.

"Oh yes because you just KNOW how close we are… practically brothers if you think about it!"

"Rodney, the man has just gone through a horrible experience! A few days ago we thought Elizabeth was dead! Then when he finally does find her she's been tortured and drugged, implanted with HIS child, only to lose that same child moments later! He could use a friend! For once would it kill you to try and at least PRETEND to be an honorable human being?!"

"Yes actually… worse than citrus," Rodney muttered sarcastically.

Carson glared at him. "Do you have any idea how many times that man has risked everything just to save your skin?"

"Carson, I'm a member of his team, not his best buddy! Heck, the only person who he really listens to is… Elizabeth…." Rodney frowned, shaking his head. "He won't talk to me."

"Look Rodney, when it comes right down to it, he does care about you… you're his friend. Just try… he deserves at least that much from you. Someone has to."

Rodney sighed. "Fine! But I'm not promising anything!"

Carson smiled at that. "You're a good man Rodney… deep, deep inside there… somewhere."

"Do you want me to help or not?!" Rodney threatened.

"Alright! Alright!" Carson said, raising his hands to surrender before leaving McKay's lab. Beckett laughed as soon as he reached the hallway….

* * *

John had just left the shower when he heard the knock at his door. Drying off quickly he grabbed his towel, dried off and threw on his jeans and a T-shirt before he limped to the door, still in pain since his run. "I'm coming!" Finally John got to the door and opened it before the person behind it could knock again. "McKay? What do you want?"

"What? Do I always have to have an agenda? I can't just see how a buddy is doing?" Rodney asked, trying to look innocent.

"No," John answered without hesitation. It was Rodney! When did Rodney EVER 'just come by to see a buddy?'

Rodney frowned. "Just come on! We're playing golf!"

"You hate golf!"

"No I don't!" Rodney persisted, only to see John staring at him. "Okay, maybe I do, but you like it, so we're going to do it."

"What's going on, McKay?!"

"Why does there have to be anything wro… fine, Carson asked me to talk to you."

"What?! Why?!" John tried to ignore the voice telling him he'd feel better if he talked about what happened. But talking wasn't his way, it never had been.

"Oh I don't know, maybe it has something to do with the fact that you feel responsible for Elizabeth getting shot and losing the baby?!"

"Look, I really appreciate this, but I don't feel up to this right now-"

"Yes, yes, yes! I know I'm not the ideal person when it comes to talking about feelings, but… you've helped me quite a few times in the past… and I think it's time I return the favor."

"Rodney, if you want to return the favor… bye me turkey sandwiches… maybe some new golf clubs… a new guitar would be nice-"

"Hey! I wasn't exactly excited about coming here! You think I want to spend hours sharing feelings and doing each other hair? This was all Carson's idea."

John shook his head, smiling, but in truth he was no where near amused. "Yeah sure, Rodney, well, let me assure you we will be doing no such thing. Tell Carson there's nothing to talk about. That way you're off the hook," John told him before stepping back inside.

"Sheppard wait-"

John shut the door in his face before he could say another word.

* * *

He was frustrated, angry, and mostly tired. He was sick of Carson telling him he couldn't see Elizabeth. He needed to see her. John knew why Elizabeth wouldn't see him. After everything she'd gone through, he couldn't really blame her, but it was killing him. She wasn't the only person who'd lost something. She wasn't the only person who felt the pain of losing something they never even had! He was responsible and he knew it was true, but he couldn't keep going without at least seeing her. He needed to tell her the truth! It was his fault, not hers, and he wouldn't let her suffer for his mistake!

John looked around his room, a desperation in him that he'd never known before. It scared him now strong it was, but he didn't fight it as he scrambled around the room, running to his dresser in search of what could possibly get him into the infirmary. Finally after throwing a few pieces of clothing on the floor, his fingertips reached something cold and metal. John grabbed the object and looked down at what he'd been searching for. He'd had the pocket knife since he'd been in the Air Force, of all the uses he'd thought of, the one he would now use it for hadn't made his list. Sheppard opened the handle to reveal the knife, grabbing it tightly as he closed his eyes, stretched out his arm and stabbed the sharp metal into his skin, as pain shot through his arm, throbbing. Blood poured down like water and John opened his eyes, sweat dripping down his face as he saw what he'd done. He'd lost it… the evidence was right there before him. He had to have finally snapped to do what he'd just done! Taking a deep breath he dropped the knife and walked out of his room….

TBC….


	11. Chapter 11

Second Chances

By Andie O'Neill

Summary: When Elizabeth Weir finally admits her feelings toward John Sheppard, he shoots her down, but after she dies in his arm, he begins to regret what he did… but of course its to late… or is it?

A/N: John's finally found a way to see Elizabeth, but will it work? And how will Elizabeth react to what he has to say? Sorry for the long wait! Bad Andie:D This story is mostly on John's end, I wanted to get a little of Elizabeth in there, but I just couldn't get through the writer's block so I had to sort of 'write around it.' But anyway, enjoy!

* * *

Chapter Eleven 

"Doctor Kirby! We've got an emergency! Colonel Sheppard passed out in front of the infirmary! He's lost a lot of blood and he seems to be dehydrated," said one of the nurses.

Doctor Lauren Kirby sighed, running out of the lab to see what Colonel Sheppard got himself into. When she finally saw him she immediately wished Carson hadn't decided to take a day off. "Alright, get him on the bed, let's close that wound and put in an IV so he can get some fluids in him!"

* * *

When he awoke, it was to the sounds of the medical machines informing him as to where he now was. John smiled weakly as he slowly lifted his head to look around. No one…. John swallowed hard, his mouth strangely dry. Time to go. He tried to sit up, closing his eyes as the room spun around him. He felt like crap, but that didn't matter, what mattered was Elizabeth, he needed to see her. He had to talk to her. John tapped into all the strength he had left, pulling himself out of bed, wincing as the IV in his arm pulled from a tangle in the lines. John grabbed some gauze and tape, pulling the IV out and taping the gauze to his arm. Once he was free of the IV, John staggered through the infirmary, hiding from nurses and Doctors alike as if he were in a combat situation. The lights had been dimmed and John had noticed it was night as he walked past a window. 

Where could she be? It wasn't busy at night, but he still needed to be careful. One false move and everything he'd done would be for nothing. He just had to be careful… very, very careful. John peaked into each curtain he passed, hoping it would be Elizabeth only to see someone else instead. He was running out of steam, but he refused to stop. He'd cut himself for Christ's sake! Okay, so it wasn't exactly normal to be injuring ones self to see a woman, but John needed to see her. She had to understand. He knew what she was going through, had seen it before, and he couldn't watch history repeat itself. Maybe he was going crazy. Maybe he'd finally lost it, but that didn't matter now. Crazy or not, he wouldn't stop now.

One more curtain to go. This had to be it. John held his breath as he slowly creped back the curtain, and there she was. John sighed in relief before sneaking inside. She was asleep… and she didn't look good. Crap! What was he doing?! He really was going insane! Normal people don't cut their arms! Normal people don't sneak around in the middle of the night not long after passing out from dehydration. Yup, he was nuts. He didn't need a psychologist to tell him that. "Elizabeth?" he whispered.

Nothing.

He could leave right then and there… and pretend nothing had ever happened. He could forget all of it. He could, so why wasn't he leaving? Why was he still standing there beside her? "Elizabeth!" he whispered again, shaking her arm gently.

Elizabeth sucked in hair; her eyes fluttering as she slowly reached consciousness. It took her a few seconds to assess her surroundings as well as the figure standing beside her. "John?"

His heart was beating a mile a minute. He couldn't breath, couldn't think, he couldn't even move.

"John, what are you doing here?" she asked, more aware.

Finally he was able to gain back control, though his heart was still pounding… his chest was even beginning to hurt. "Elizabeth… we need to talk."

"We need to talk? John, what the heck are you doing here?"

John frowned… he might as well tell her. She wouldn't just let it go. "Uh… I may have accidentally cut myself… and apparently it turns out if you happen to skip a few meals, the blood loss does a little more damage. Before I knew it, I was waking up in a bed in the infirmary with an IV in my arm."

"You cut yourself?!"

"Shhhh!" Good going Elizabeth, wake up the whole city why don't you?! "No I didn't cut myself!" he lied. Elizabeth stared at him in disbelief. "Okay… I may have cut myself a bit… but that's not the point! I needed to talk to you-"

"That's not the point?! That's not the point?! John, are you even hearing yourself speak here, or am I talking to a wall?"

John sighed. This was going well. "Elizabeth! I have done anything and everything to see you, but Carson said you wouldn't see me! Did you really expect me to do nothing?"

"No, but I also didn't think you'd go off cutting yourself either!" Elizabeth fought.

John knew she was angry, but at least he could for once see a spark in her eye… he hadn't seen that since before their child was killed… and it was all his fault! He'd done all this to talk to her though, not argue. "Well I did okay?! I didn't know what else to do! I was scared!"

Elizabeth closed her eyes for a second, shaking her head. "Scared?"

"You wouldn't see me… or anyone else for that matter. I was afraid you might…" John couldn't even begin to finish that sentence. "I had to make sure your okay."

Elizabeth looked away at that, no longer willing to meet his gaze. "John… I'm fine."

"I know you better than that, Elizabeth. If it's killing me, it has to be killing you. We both lost something here… but I won't let you deal with this alone. I know what you're going through-"

Suddenly Elizabeth was angry. "And what exactly makes you an expert?! Just because it was yours doesn't mean you know a thing!"

"Elizabeth! I had the freakin' gun in my hands! For all I know, this is my fault! That I understand perfectly well. You're right, I don't know what it's like for you, but that doesn't mean I'll let you push me away! I refuse to let you do this alone!"

"Why John? What do you care if I go though this alone or not?! The baby's gone, John! You're not tied to me in anyway! So why are you here?!"

She was crying now… he had to tell her. "I'm here because I won't let history repeat itself!" he finally told her, trying to fight his own tears at the situation. He was losing his mind! He wasn't sure how everything had gotten so screwed up so fast, but that didn't matter now. He had to pick up the pieces… because he wouldn't lose her. He couldn't do it all again.

"John-"

"Did I ever tell you about my brother?" he asked.

Elizabeth looked up at him in surprise, watching him take a seat on her bed, his eyes turned away from her now. "Brother? I thought you were an only child?"

"No… I had a younger brother… his name was Michael… Michael Sheppard. I was about ten when my mom found out she was pregnant again. I wasn't sure what to make of it, but my parents… they were just so happy about it, I figured that I should be happy too." John slowly turned to look at her, finally letting a single tear fall down his face. "Then when he was born… I absolutely hated it. Suddenly my parents didn't know I existed. My Dad stopped taking me up to the golf course… he was too busy watching after the baby. My Mom didn't have the time to bother with me either… and if she wasn't taking care of little Mike, she was lying in bed completely exhausted. It didn't get any better as he got older either, but for some reason Mike looked up to me. He wouldn't leave me alone. Everywhere I went, he had to go. Everything I did, he wanted to do, and when he wasn't allowed to do it he'd freak out! Another person would have thought he was being attacked or something. I was so sick of it! My parents gave in to him everything time, and I always had to make the sacrifices. I was tired of it… I was tired of him having to follow me around like a little puppy. My friends were tired of it too. All we wanted to do was put a stop to it."

"What happened?" Elizabeth asked quietly.

John sighed, trying to hold on to his control. He hated telling it, but he had to tell Elizabeth. He had to tell her the truth. "My friends and I were going to head toward this park… it was surrounded by woods and ravines. We loved hanging out there after school. I came home that day and told my Mom where I was going… and like always Mike threw a fit! He wouldn't stop crying and it didn't take my Mother long before she was begging me to let the kid come with me. We got into this huge argument until my Mom simply told me that either he went, or no one went. So I took him along… and of course my friends were beyond tired when they saw him walk with me to the ravine. Not too many people knew about it… it was our own private sanctuary. Going across the ravine was this huge tree that had been uprooted in a storm ages ago. We all liked to climb over to the other side. I knew Mike was afraid, but I didn't care. I told him to stay on the other side if he was gonna be a chicken about it. I wanted to get rid of him, but he was too stubborn… he refused to stay. Once I'd crossed the ravine it was Mike's turn. I told him to turn back, that he couldn't do it, but he wouldn't listen. I thought he'd give up once he realized how dangerous it was… only he never did."

"Oh my god… he didn't!"

John shook his head. "It'd rained the night before… the tree was slippery. Mike tried his best, but he kept slipping. He made it to the middle of the tree before begging for my help. I wouldn't help him! I was such an idiot! I just told him to go back, that I wouldn't help. My friends and I turned away, ready to leave him. He got desperate. He tried to get the rest of the way across only to slip. He hit his head against some rocks. As soon as I realized what'd happened I jumped down and got him out of there. Some friends of mine ran to get help, but there was nothing anyone could do. He slipped into a coma… blood seeped into his brain and it was too late. He died on the operating table." He couldn't hold back the tears as he thought of his brother… he'd never forgive himself for what happened. John stared into her eyes, trying to hold back a sob. "When the Doctor's told us he was gone… my Mom took it the worst. She tried to be strong for me and my Dad, but in the end it just wasn't enough. She overdosed on pain killers…."

Elizabeth closed her eyes to stop her own tears, not sure how to react to what John was telling her. "Why? Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I won't let it happen to you, Elizabeth! I know you blame yourself, but it's not you who you should be blaming. Elizabeth, I'd do anything to take back what happened, but I can't, just as I can't change what happened to Mike. I love you, Elizabeth… and I can't live with the idea of losing you. I don't want to lose you the way I lost my Mother."

Elizabeth sighed, pulling John into a hug to his surprise. She held him hard, and John couldn't fight the sob that ripped from him as Elizabeth held him.

"I can't lose you, Elizabeth! I just can't!"

"You won't! I swear to you, John… you will never lose me," Elizabeth whispered back. "Oh god, I am so sorry! I never should have pushed you away! I am so sorry, John!"

It felt like hours before they finally let go of each other, both spent after the emotional rollercoaster they'd just been on. John rested his forehead against hers, closing his eyes tight. "I don't deserve you."

Elizabeth just stroked his cheek. "Yeah well, I'll try to overlook that one," she told him, holding him even tighter. Her joke did the trick, John laughed.

John looked down at Elizabeth; suddenly feeling like his burden was being lifted. Maybe together there was hope… maybe they could get through what had happened. He had to believe everything would work out.

Suddenly Elizabeth frowned.

"What is it? Is something wrong?" John asked, worried once more.

Elizabeth laid a hand on her stomach. "Get Carson, now!"

"What? Why?"

She just shook her head. "I'm not sure. I've been feeling weird ever since the accident… something's not right, John. I could have sworn…" Elizabeth shook her head in confusion. "I could have sworn I just felt a kick."

John swallowed hard before running from the bed in search of Carson. He wasn't sure what was going on, but he did know one thing… they definitely needed Carson.

TBC….

A/N: Mwhahahahahaha, what in the world is going on? I'm sure ya'll will figure it out, you usually do! Oh and keep in mind when John goes looking for Carson he doesn't know Carson's taken a couple days off! It isn't an accident! I did it on purpose:)


End file.
